Yep... I'm still alive...

I know it has been ages since I posted anything. So let me try to catch everyone up on the basics...

1- James has gone MIA...(Please dont say I told you so...) I am not sure what happened except I have not heard from him since about 10 mins before he was to board a plane in Istanbul heading to New York and then here in Ga. I truly don't know if he is dead or alive, or if he was just the greatest illusion ever, but I knew going into the relationship that one of the possible outcomes would be that he wouldn't show up at some point. I am really okay with everything.... Now I know why I have been through so many different endings to my different loves... However, I will never give up hope that God may yet still send me a miracle and that would be a man (alive and breathing) who will love me unconditionally for the rest of my life... Anything other than that will just be icing on the cake... I think I am a good person and deserve to be loved deeply by someone....

2- A week before James' expected arrival, I was diagnosed with a huge hernia...However, the doc says it was probably caused by my weight loss (as of today that is a total of 54 pounds) and since I am not done yet, he doesn't want to operate on it. Also, the expected recovery time will be about 6 weeks and I don't have 6 weeks of free time to give to this problem at the moment.

3- A week after James was supposed to be here, I got word from my landlady that she had intentions of selling her house and I needed to move..... in 5 days!!! Well, with the help of Jimmy, Tabi and a volunteer/good friend who had an 18 foot trailer, I did it... I am now regally installed in the "spare?" bedroom at Jimmy's house for the time being...

4- I keep getting impressions that something phenomenal is just around the corner for me in my life... I am not sure if it is a new love, a new job or a new place to live that is not in Tifton... I have been thinking seriously recently about where I might like to move to maybe this summer....Too long to go into the reasons why here, but I really have no reason not to think about things such as these...

Stay tuned.. more episodes later from the "boring life of Susan..."

Just a reminder...

This will be a short post... Just a reminder as to one aspect of my personality that may not surface many times...
When I am really quiet...it usually means that
1- I am not feeling well at all or
2- I have some problem, situation, worry, whatever you want to call it on my mind or
3- A combination of both...

Right now, I am really, really quiet and that is why this post is short....

Things are good, in fact, wonderful overall, but there are a couple of major pockets of trials I still have to get through...

I just ask for your prayers to be added along with mine...

Talk to everyone later... when this trial is through

Update...

This week.... better week in most ways... Getting to love my students more each day... if I could just remember their names... I keep getting someone added everyday!!
Serious story... Too sad not to be true...
Chapter 1 in our book is about the Geography, physical features, etc. about Ga. There are a couple of Indian Words that are pretty cool, and I know my kids are familiar with at least one of them... Okefenokee Swamp...it means "Land of the Trembling Earth...Piedmont...At the foot of the mountains... WELL... Thursday, one of my darlings comes up to me and said...Ms. Tucker, there is a cuss word in this book... I looked at her and said.. really, show me...so , she pointed to a picture of one of the rivers in Ga...As I stared in amazement, I was desperately trying to figure out what the heck she was talking about!! Finally, i asked her to show me the specific word...She said...it's right here... It doesnt have the meaning right beside it because i guess the people who wrote the book didn't want people to get mad! I STILL HAVE NO IDEA WHAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT ...when she suddenly says, "Doesn't this mean ...Hoochie who talks a lot...The river's name is the Chattahoochee River!!!!! I almost lost it!!!!
And it is only week 2!!!

Realizations

This weekend has been a series of realizations...
My parents are getting older...
My "free" weekends have officially ended
My classroom is too close to the nurse's office at school
No matter how hard a person tries, there is no way everyone is going to be happy by a decision made
The decisions we make when we are younger really do have a lasting affect on those we love.
No matter how close you are to someone, there are things about them you never really know bother them.
It is impossible to describe an abstract feeling to someone who has no idea of that feeling.
I wish that physically not feeling good were not so closely related to mentally not feeling good...
I wish there were less people in the world who judge and more who love unconditionally

One of those rare days...

Today, I have had the luxury of doing absolutely nothing if I chose not to! However, I did do my laundry... all two small loads, my dishes...all 18 pieces of unwashed miscellaneous dishes used this week, and gave Lacey a bath...probably the last one she will get between now and December break. I didn't make it to bed at my regular hour yesterday... I actually feel asleep at 6:00 on my love seat and in my school clothes... I did stay awake from 8:30 till around 10 and then was back in bed... Such ended the first week of school! Today, James surprised me by leaving early from his work site and getting online about two hours earlier than he normally can. We were able to talk on IM for quite a while which was really nice. Because of the 7 hour time difference, it is difficult to get a time when either he or I are not sleepy and ready to go to bed. He is getting worn out after over three months working 12-15 hours a day/7 days a week and is really ready for a break. We are waiting on the company in New York for paperwork and second installment of funds and then he can come back here for a well deserved break. The best part is that we actually get to meet in person! Quite frankly, since my summer was consumed with classes and getting ready for the upcoming year, I could use a break too! I am learning to be grateful for the little things in life. The power of prayer and tithing is working miracles in the lives of my children and I am praying that some of that spills over into my life at the moment. Limbo is not a place I like to linger long... Till later..

Bring it on!!

Okay...so I have more students this year than I ever have before (110)...so about 10 of them are special education students...so what if I am just days away from taking two "less than exciting" online classes.... I AM A TEACHER !!! BRING IT ON !!
Seriously, I think my students this year will be a really fun group. I had my "come to Jesus meeting" with my second period, so I think I might have nipped potential misbehavior in the bud in that class, but the others already have their own personality. Most of them stated that they don't like History. So I told them I was going to give a lesson next week where I would show them that "Mrs. Tucker "sees dead people!" Actually, it's my now almost world famous CSI lesson, but at least I got their attention until next week. :-) Parental support seems good at the moment. We had about 60 show up for Open House. I have the son of the lady who does my hair in my class, I have a cousin of one of my former students (the cousin said I was really cool) and I have the sibling of one of my first year students. I guess I have been teaching long enough now to say I feel comfortable doing it. For those of you who don't realize it.... this is my 7th year teaching!! Whatever is in store for this year...BRING IT ON !!!

Farewell, Summer...I wish I knew thee well....

I have no idea where my "3 Free Month's of Summer Vacation" went... Probably the same place that my "3 free days off without pay before December"..Anywho...
I will just take a moment and tell the world as I know it...Hasta Lavista...until about December anyway...Although officially, we teachers don't go back into the classroom until Tuesday, Aug 4th, it is surprising (not) how many cars have been up at the school for the last week or so...I must confess I have spent far less time up there this year than in previous years...I just can't get mentally "into it" at the moment. Could be that I am burned out, brain dead, tired, pooped or all of the above from my "restful" summer. I love my job as a teacher... just have a problem with "cookie cutter teaching", "teacher pay based on standardized test scores", "playing politics", "eye candy teachers" and several other small issues like that. I think I would have made a wonderful teacher in a one room schoolhouse...Wait ! I would have had to teach Math! Forget it! I learned several new things over the summer that I am anxious to put into practice in my classroom and all the above mentioned issues be D---ned!
Couple of side notes... I have been asked to be the guest speaker at the DAR's Constitution Celebration supper on September 22nd. My topic will be "Why the Constitution is still an enduring document." Whew!! Heavy topic!
I was approached by the Assistant Chief of Police (Former Marine, survivor of Iwo Jima and good friend) about the possibility of having my History Club youngins at the Veteran's Day Observance for the City of Tifton this year. Purpose- they will be laying a plaque for the Marines at Veteran's Park and they He and the Chief, along with several of my veteran buddies wanted my kids to witness it and be a part of that history, also. I told him that chances were slim to none because it would be during the school day. He said that he and the Chief would see what they could do.
My third of five semesters of my Graduate classes also begin in August. The 17th to be exact..These will be research related classes...Yuck!!!! They will not end until December 11th. Then I will be on the downhill slope to my Specialist Degree!
Sometime during all these fun activities, I will be trying to find my "life." So, if you don't see me...don't despair! Just look for me at one of four places...
At home, at school, online or at church!! See Ya!